- Why I Hate Safewords and How Not To Use Them
- Notes for a Bottom: How to Ask for What You Need
- Inside This Top's Mind: It's a Mess Up There
- I was in a Polynesian place on business the last few days (I know, I know: tough life--but the inside of a conference room is the inside of a conference room, even when it's tropical outside). Saw one of those cultural shows with all the exotic dancing (not that kind, you pervs!) and grass skirts, etc. There was one number, Tongan perhaps, where they had these sticks that were split into almost broom-like ends and they would smack them against themselves to make this percussive "chook!" sound. As I was sitting there with all these families, I'm thinking, "I gotta get me a few of those. They'd be great to smack an ass with!" Talk about perv.
- Before you talk, think. Before you react negatively to someone, be ready to articulate why you're feeling that way. It's okay to feel negative, whether it's legitimate or not. I like to say, "Your perception is 9/10ths of your reality." It's true, if you think about it. So, even if you're negative about something, even if it's not legitimate, it's real to you. To be fair to the individual you may be having these thoughts about, the best thing to do is to be able to communicate why you have these feelings. Get them out on the table. Announce them. Even as you know they may not be fair, you can say that, too. Best not to leave your cloud of doom hovering over the other without clear definition on what is going on in your head. Does that make sense? If you do this, you can get quicker resolution to what's bothering you. (What the hell does that have to do with any kind of "Dark Musing" anyway? you ask, and rightfully so. Nothing. Just an observation I had that I thought I'd share. It's my blog. So button it.)