Tuesday, July 27, 2010

EO: Moon of Jupiter Part IV

He pinched her nipples, hard. She moaned and arched her back toward him, pressing her rear into his jumpsuit. She felt him. He reached an arm around and squeezed her throat, not choking, just controlling. He pressed his face up to her ear, “Don’t you embarrass me again,” he muttered. She stiffened, reached back and grabbed his manhood.

“I won’t,” she promised, her voice quiet. Her breathing grew heavier. He focused his attention on her breasts, inflicting his pain there, while he bit hard on her shoulder. “Aaaah!” she muttered.

O’Conner pushed back then, as if he snapped out of the erotic moment, and attacked her ass with a flurry of new blows, smacking her bottom open-palmed again and again without slowing down or stopping. “Oh God, O’Conner!” Steph pleaded. He eased up, rubbing her cheeks. Then he grabbed a handful of her flesh, squeezing the sweet spots, digging in with both hands, his carefully trimmed fingernails digging in. “Owwww…”

He grabbed her by the waist then and pulled her away from the wall, the two floating in the compartment. He twisted beside her, facing away from her, and said, “I want you to count how many strokes I give you. Can you do that?” There was a pause, then a quiet, “Yes.”

He began swatting her again, sometimes with his middle finger striking exactly on the sweet spot, sometimes open-palmed, sometimes cupped, sometimes thuddy, sometimes stingy. He varied tempo. Paused. Launched into a high-speed flurry. Stopped. Then methodically hit like a metronome. He stopped.

“How many?” he asked.

“Uh…” Steph thought, her mind panicked. What if I get it wrong? “Uh… 48?”

“No,” O’Conner replied. “52. You were waaay off.”

“What happens now?” Steph asked, sniffling.

“We do it again.” O’Conner launched into another volley of spanks. This went on for a few minutes until he asked her again. “Oh shit,” Steph replied, mind racing. “Uh…65?”

There was a long pause.

“No, Steph,” O’Conner said, and Steph openly sobbed at that. “It was 66.”

“I was only one off! Only one!”

“True, but not right.” And he went at it again. Steph thought she was going to really lose it. Hot tears streamed down her cheeks. A few released and floated in front of her face. O’Conner’s torque from the spankings had sent them into a sort of spin in the cabin and he bumped his back into a protruding set of knobs, hard. “FUCK!” he yelled, stopping.

Steph turned and looked at him. “What?” He grabbed his back and she saw his face contorted in pain and couldn’t help but laugh through the streaming tears.

“What the fuck are you laughing at!?” he yelled.

“Nice to see you in a little bit of pain,” she said, wiping her eyes. She felt the scene had ended somehow.

O’Conner laughed then. “Okay,” he said, rubbing the spot on his back. “Touché.” Grabbing a hold, he repositioned himself to face her and she turned to face him. “You deserved that,” he said. She wrapped her arms around him.

“So did you,” she said, motioning to his back. He glared at her, then his look softened. He pulled her toward him and kissed her on the mouth, not for the first time this mission. “Are you okay?” she asked, concerned.

“It’ll be fine,” he replied.

“I won’t embarrass you again, Commander,” she said, pushing away from him so she floated slowly, her breasts pointing at him playfully. “By the way, when do we get to test that new gravity unit?”

“Scheduled for 0900 hours,” he said.

“Want to give it a go a little early?” she said, a raffish smile creeping up on her lips.

Saturday, July 24, 2010

One Year Anniversary of Dark Musing

On July 3, 2009 I launched Dark Musing with the idea of sharing a Top's eye view of the lifestyle. In that time I've talked about my philosophies, opened up about my feelings, shared some hot scenes, some crushes, some crashes and quite a few funny stories.

I never thought I'd have it in me to make it a year, and I couldn't have stayed with it had it not been for you, the Constant Reader. I appreciate your attention and your comments and encouragement.

Thank you.

Friday, July 23, 2010

EO: Moon of Jupiter Part III

Have a nice weekend everyone!

EO: Moon of Jupiter Part III

O’Conner switched it up again, cupping his hand and smacking her bottom much harder than he had before, the sound more drum-like. “You going to spank me all day?” Steph asked, her ire rising as her embarrassment grew. “Don’t know yet,” O’Conner replied, curtly. “We’ll see how it goes.” Steph smacked the wall panel in frustration. “Now, now, now. There will be none of that, young lady. You think you’d be just a bit more contrite after putting me through that embarrassment with Houston.”

He got leverage and grabbed her panties, pulling them down to her bent knees in one deft move. “Holy shit! What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” Steph screamed, glaring at O’Conner. But he didn’t reply. He dipped a finger between her legs.

“Interesting,” he said as she took in a rapid breath of air. “For someone so ‘put out’ by her punishment you seem to be enjoying yourself quite a bit, don’t you think?” Steph’s face grew red and she buried it back in her hands. Outside the station, the orbit took it into the shadow of the sun, the module growing dark. Automatically, warm florescent task lighting winked on, the cold brightness of the sun’s rays fading away to darkness. He rubbed a finger there, briefly, before going back to his punishment.

“Just get it over with, will you?” she muttered.

“Are you sure that’s what you want?” O’Conner asked, spanking her again with a volley of rapid-fire smacks.

“I…I don’t know what I want,” Steph succumbed. O’Conner smiled, but she couldn’t see it. He looked around the module and found what he was looking for just out of reach: a telescoping rod with a magnet at the tip used for fishing loose metal objects from narrow crevasses and seams. He collapsed the antenna-like device into a shorter, stocky and more robust implement.

O’Conner placed one hand on the top of her ass and carefully lined up the tool, pulled back and hit her on the bottom, hard. “Ouch!” Steph screetched.

“Shhhh,” O’Conner said. “Or it’ll just get worse.” Steph closed her mouth, quickly, and bit her arm when O’Conner brought the metal telescoping rod evenly across her cheeks again and again until they were red with welts. Steph began to sob, so very quietly.

O’Conner began to rub the welts, pushing firmly on them and once again uttered, “Shhhh.” Only this time it sounded much more compassionate than it did a few minutes earlier. He pulled her sports bra up then, exposing her naked back to him. She didn’t complain. He waited for her tears to subside. “I think you’re starting to learn your lesson, young lady,” he said to her, striking her lightly a few times on her back, then letting the rod go to float away on the kinetic energy of his release, reaching around to squeeze Steph’s perky breasts.

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Shadow Lane Countdown

I don't go in for such things, but is anyone else counting down the days to Shadow Lane? Why does it already seem like it's been MONTHS and MONTHS since FMS? Weren't we just in Tampa a few weeks ago? All I know is my hand is itching.

Who's going?

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

EO: Moon of Jupiter Part II

She floated there for a moment, just staring at him. What the hell am I supposed to do now? She looked at the hairnet over the camera. He’d wadded it up in such a way that it completely obliterated any opportunity for the optics to pick up anything going on in the Lab module. “I’m waiting,” he said, looking quite testy and, if Steph was going to be honest, just a bit hot.

“I can’t believe I’m doing this,” she said, making a decision and unzipping the front of her jumpsuit. She wore white cotton panties and a cotton sports bra, both regulation. O’Conner could see the darkness of her nipples through the white ribbed fabric. He kept his eyes locked on hers, however. She wriggled out of her jumpsuit, which isn’t easy without something to push back on, but she was adept at it. She used a hand to steady herself and looked at him. “You’re not going to spank me.”

“I don’t think you’re in any position to argue,” O’Conner said. “I told you you needed to be punished, and that’s exactly what I’m going to do.” He reached for her.

“Don’t touch me!” Steph replied. “This is weird.”

“Not as weird as it’ll be when I remove this,” he said, reaching for the hairnet. “You’d have your own embarrassment with C&C, wouldn’t you?”

“Okay, okay!” Steph said. She was on a career path to Commander and she wasn’t going to mar that trajectory with some stupid “sex scandal.” “Fine.” She turned around and braced her arms against two panel handles that jutted out of a section of the experiment rack. She placed her sock-covered feet below on a shelf and presented her bottom to him. “Just get it over with, for Chrissakes.”

O’Conner floated around behind her and placed a strong hand on her waist. He leaned in and whispered in her ear, “Don’t you ever embarrass me like that again,” he said, growling. “I respect you too much to something inane like that.” And before he finished his sentence, his hand struck her left cheek, hard!

“Hey!” she shouted, turning to look back at him and glaring. “That was hard!” She saw something in his face that told her he was serious…and not done.

“Don’t move,” was all he said.

He smacked her other cheek, just as hard. She yelped. He repeated this a few times, then leaned down and grabbed her waist, spanking her bottom in a flurry of rapid, open-palmed strikes. O’Conner could hear her breathing change. She started to breath more heavily. “I’ll teach you a lesson about respect!”

He made his fingers rigid and smacked her again, with just the fingers, so it was quite stingy. Steph moaned and lowered her head to her hands.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Flash Fucktion: An Experiment

My lovely bride is a professional author. She told me some time ago about a writing trend called "Flash Fiction," short stories or chapters of longer stories that can be read in just a couple of minutes. Add to that thought the conversation I was having with Erica yesterday that I was frustrated my blog just doesn't seem to get much traffic. Perhaps I'm too philosophical, I wondered aloud. Perhaps I don't have enough naughty stuff. Porn and kink are popular. Parallel to that I've been enjoying some of Lizzy's fiction. To be honest, I don't really get off on the written word (I'm a man, man! to paraphrase Austin Powers--wow, there's a contemporary reference!), but I've found a few of Lizzie's recent stories (yesterday's, one on her scene at FMS with Miss Chris, a part one of a sci-fi story) quite titillating and they've got all my creative juices flowing (so to speak).

So, I've decided to coin the term "Flash Fucktion" as a way to describe these short, easy-to-digest kink stories, told my way.

Here's part one of my first Flash Fucktion. Your feedback will determine whether I continue or not:

EO: Moon of Jupiter--Part 1/Log 331-a

O’Conner floated into the Lab Bay, like he always did when he awoke. Unshaven, he had a toothbrush in his mouth like a cigarette.

“Morning, loser,” Steph said, barely glancing at him as he pulled himself to a view window to take a peek at Eo, glowing yellowish-orange in the blush of Jupiter. “Mmmumph dalloph,” O’Conner replied. “Right,” Steph said, continuing to fine tune her lab experiment.

“I didn’t lose,” he said, pulling the toothbrush out of his mouth and depositing it into a Ziploc bag. Unsure what to do with the froth in his mouth he decided to reopen the bag and spat into it, sealing it again. “I was just slightly second.”

Steph wrinkled her nose at his hygiene as a smile crept on her lips. “Loser.”

O’Conner ran his fingers through his hair and slid up next to her. “How are the Gamma tests going today?” he asked, pretending to be interested. “HETE-3 is sending good data back and we’re bouncing it to Fermi Gamma-ray Space Telescope back home.”

“Great,” O’Conner said, utterly uninterested, yanking the digital camera off the charger and snapping a few photos out the view window. “I want to talk to you about something.” Something in O’Conner’s voice made Steph stop and turn to look at him. The orange glow from Jupiter made him look tan and attractive. “You really made me look silly out there yesterday,” he said, suddenly serious.

“I did?” Steph seemed genuinely concerned. “I didn’t mean to.”

“That feed went to Houston Beta,” O’Conner said. “I got a lot of shit from Command and Control over you bum rushing the airlock to beat me. You know that beat protocol. NASA protocol.”

Steph hung her head. “I know.” Then she locked eyes with him. “I just wanted to win.”

“Of course you did, you competitive bitch,” O’Conner said, a sly grin on his face. “But between your protocol breach and the AI at C&C giving me shit, you’re going to need to learn you can’t always win, regardless of our relationship up here.” Again, Steph looked down and replied meekly, “I know.”

“Come here.” O’Conner said, releasing his grip from the Bay to float freely. Steph pressed a few buttons on the experiment module to put it on Auto and gently pushed away from it, moving gracefully across the room. O’Conner took a hair net from a Velcro pad near his head and put it over the cabin camera and stuffed a gym sock from his pocket over the mic.

“Why did you do that?” she asked, her voice slightly husky.

“Because I want you to take off your jumpsuit.”

“What?!” Steph exclaimed. “Why??”

“Because I’m going to punish you for embarrassing me. I’m going to spank you.” Steph looked at the covered camera and mic. She looked at O’Conner. He wasn’t fucking around. He was pissed. She must’ve really made him look foolish to the C&C bots.

Thursday, July 8, 2010

A Short Anecdote

I have been wanting to change my nickname on FetLife for some time. Originally someone had told me you couldn't. I did a very superficial dig on FL to see and it appeared that person was right. Either I didn't dig well or FL changed their rules, because I discovered at random the other day you can simply email FL and they will change your nickname anytime! So I did!

I started out as "Showman451" many moons ago when we first entered public play. "Showman" partially for what I do for a living and for the fact I like fire & wax, which are very "showy" and 451 because, well, Hotmail already had Showman1-23 taken and I didn't want to be Showman24, just seemed sooo CompuServe, so I chose 451 because it was from one of my favorite books growing up and because 451 degrees is the temperature paper spontaneously combusts, which also went back to Showman. A bit.

Over time I "migrated" to Craig Aych and felt over time the name name and the nickname got confusing, thus my desire to change.


I contacted FL to request the name change. I asked to please change my name to craigaych, thinking about logins and how they aren't case sensitive. I never once thought about capitalization in a D/s sort of way. So when I got a message from a fellow kinkster on FL saying, "So, I see you've gone from Showman451 to craigaych. Anything you want to tell me?" I had to reread the message a few times and said to myself, "Oh shit. I look like a sub now."

So I wrote to FL again and said, "Look, it's all my fault, but could you change my nickname again to CraigAych from craigaych?" They rapidly and politely made the change.

I got the usual autobot response that informed me the change had taken place, but I had also received an email from Matt in Tech Support over there at FL who notified me of the change and signed the email, "Happy Spanking!"

Which got me thinking: is this what Matt in Technical Support always replies? If so, isn't that a bit odd to send that to a bottom? Or someone into bondage? Then it started to eat at me. It was so contextually accurate. Did I know Matt? Did Matt know me? Know my profile? Even if you looked at my subscribed groups or my kinks you wouldn't necessarily know what I was mostly into.

So I leave you with this parting thought: FL staffers know all, see all.

Sunday, July 4, 2010

Nonmonogamous Relationships

I'm working on a theme here over the last few posts. "Involuntary Friendships" started that theme, which then led into the second entry "NRE." Lizzie was prescient enough to share the book "Opening Up" (link to Amazon in NME post), a book about all kinds of nontraditional relationship structures, what most people consider swinging or polyamorous relationships.

I was a bit started to read that some of these relationships could be deep and complex (in a good way) and not involve sex. "Oh," I thought, "Friendships." But, no. Well, yes and no. It's complicated. There's all sorts of things that come into play, particularly in BDSM (see also: spanko) relationships--at least the non-fleeting party-based throw-yourself-across-a-lap kind of things--where deeper feelings come into play. Perhaps love. But I'd like to say, simply, "intimate emotions." I've read for years and heard from friends about "emotional cheating." Really? Is that like where it says in the Bible that thinking a sin is just as bad as doing it? Well, fuck me! I was set to go to hell a long, long time ago, I guess.

All my life I've connected better with women than men. Some of my best friends over the years have been women. I have deep emotional attachments to those people. Is that emotional cheating? Or does that only occur when one has lustful thoughts or thoughts you're only supposed to have for your spouse? I can't keep track. And on top of that, it doesn't make sense to my worldview.

Since playing publicly I've made some rather intense personal connections with a few choice women, people I care deeply about and whom I would drop everything to help if the need arose. Best friends? Or is that a "relationship"? And what if it is a relationship? According to "Opening Up" a form of nonmonogamous relationship is one in which you can have deeply personal, incredibly intense emotional relationships with people that don't necessarily involve sex (whatever your personal definition of "sex" might be). I found that fascinating.

In my last blog I asked for some thoughts on the subject I was writing about and was a bit frustrated it didn't elicit a more open discussion. (Perhaps I should be cross-posting these topics on FetLife where they'll get more traffic.) So I'll ask: what do you think? Do you believe these relationships are nonmonogamous?

Thursday, July 1, 2010


I’m reading a very interesting booked called “Opening Up: A Guide to Creating and Sustaining Open Relationships” (thank you, Lizzie!). It’s available on Amazon.

The book delves into a wide variety of relationship types ranging from the D/s, master/slave, to traditional swinging, polyamory, nonmonogomy and a variety of interesting and unusual permutations.

In reading through this book I came across a fascinating section on how we feel when we enter into new relationships:

“When you meet someone you like, when your crush is reciprocated, when you first pursue a relationship, you’re blissed out. You can’t get your mind off him. You’re anxious until the next time you see her. You’re completely focused on the two of you-it’s easy to shut out the rest of the world. When you’re together, you can’t keep your hands off each other.

Research has shown that many of these feelings and behaviors stem from chemical changes in your brain. When you first feel attraction, begin a relationship, and fall in love, levels of dopamine and norepinephrine (natural stimulants) increase in the limbic system; in addition, activity increases in the parts of your brain involved in arousal and pleasure.

When you bundle together the physical (chemical changes in your body) and the emotional and psychological (intense feelings and thoughts), you’ve got what some people call new relationship energy (often referred to as NRE)."

The term is more commonly known as limerence. Limerence is defined by "The New Oxford American Dictionary" as the state of being infatuated or obsessed with another person, typically involuntarily, and characterized by a strong desire for reciprocation of one’s feelings but not primarily for a sexual relationship.


There it was, right on the page. A definition I’d been looking for, a word I could never find because I didn’t knew it even existed. Limerence. How many of us have experience limerence in our kink relationships? Or NRE? What have your experiences been like? Good or bad? Is it a “drug” to you that you want to have again and again? Or does it just happen (the word “involuntarily” is used in the definition, isn’t it?).