Friday, July 29, 2011

Okay. Now this is friggin' ridiculous.



Special thanks to Lizzie for this kinky food entry. It's a butt tater from her local farmer's market! (If you spank a butt tater do you get a hot potato or mashed?)

Wednesday, July 27, 2011

More Kinky Food

Trust me, I don't want to become "the kinky food blog" (come to think of it, I should start that), but after getting Chrossed for my nipple potato photo I had to share. I was at an Italian place in Atlanta recently and they served bread rolls with the salad. Here's one of the bread rolls. Enjoy.

Sunday, July 24, 2011

Chrossed Again



I just had to take a moment to thank Chross for getting Chrossed again, and this time for my very unspanky nipple clamps on a red potato. Of all the blogs to get Chrossed!


Well, I'm not going to bite the hand that feeds me traffic (as I have in the past...).


Thank you for the Chross. Hopefully I'll have more pithy, entertaining or kinky shit to say.

Saturday, July 16, 2011

Nipple Clips? Potato Chips!

I'm weird. I know it. The other day I was cooking and pulled this potato out of the bag. "Looks like a nipple!" I said to myself. Before too much longer I had a pair of nipple clamps out and I was performing some sadistic maneuvers on the poor red spud. 


Why? For no other reason than your enjoyment! And what did that poor potato get in return? Eaten as a delicious garlic mash. Mmmmm!

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

A Beth's-Eye-View of Our Last Scene



Beth posted a really great description of our last scene at the Lair (as I wrote about here). You can read her report of it here. Enjoy!

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Addicted to Fetish? Take the Quiz!

(NOTE: Let me just start by saying I'm not experiencing this problem, but was just musing on this today...)


How do you know if you're a Fetish Addict?


Let's take the Fetish Addict Quiz:


1.) How much do you surf FetLife? 0-1 hour a day: 0 points, 2-3 hours a day: 1 point, 3-6 hours a day: 2 points, 6-20 hours a day: 20 points


2.) How often are you at your local dungeon? 1 night a week: 0 points, 2 nights a week: 2 points, 3 nights a week: 4 points, Can I sleep there?: 20 points


3.) How often do you visit Kink.com? when I want to wank: 0 points, when I'm bored: 2 points, when I can stream it: 3 points, replaced my TiVo: 20 points


4.) How much do you troll kink blogs (like this one)? once in a while: 0 points, every time my RSS feed gets pinged: 2 points, I'm Chross-ing all day long: 20 points


5.) Have you purchased something kinky through Amazon? no: 0 points, yes: 20 points


6.) When Extreme Restraints is having a sale do you... browse to see what fucked up shit is on clearance?: 0 points, check the available credit on your Visa?: 2 points, stop eating for a few days so you can afford that amazing new chrome spreader bar?: 20 points


Add up your score!


If your total is between 0-3 you're not a Fetish Addict.
If your total is between 4-8 you should think about watching a little more vanilla TV.
If your total is between 9-20 it's time to call a lifestyle-friendly shrink.
If your total is over 20 you're a Fetish Addict.

Monday, July 4, 2011

Fetish Fourth!

As we celebrate this patriotic day in which we acknowledge our humble beginnings as a nation and freedom from tyranny, let us also say thanks to our founding fathers for allowing us the freedom to express ourselves. In this country we get to do explore pretty much what we wish and do so in as public of a way as we see fit. That's a rare opportunity. Enjoy it. Enjoy the holiday everyone!

Friday, July 1, 2011

Saturday at the Lair with Beth

I met up with Beth at her hotel to pick her up to go to dinner. Being silly, I called her a terrible name when I got there. Being sillier, she playfully slapped me in the face. I grabbed her and promptly gave her an over-the-panties spanking in her suite (she'd been upgraded after waiting for an hour for her room!) that left her red:




She got ready and we were soon out to NoHo (North Hollywood's "clever" branding for their bohemian arts district--little more than a two block stretch of Lankershim Blvd. in an otherwise semi-industrial part of the San Fernando Valley) to a great little organic pizza place. After dinner, it was time to head over to the Lair for a scene very different from those we'd had before there.


First off, this was going to be a "pushing" scene, one in which I was doing to pushing. Beth wanted to be pushed, to have me go to the threshold of her pain, to play harder than we had played before. She wanted to have her comfort zones pushed. 


We had agreed before we went that we would play in the main room, rather than our usual spot off the kitchen in a small, quiet room really meant for only two scenes to happen at once. This would mean more eyes on her/us and more "public" play than we had done before.


We found a spot to play. Months before, in the cold damp of winter, we had had to play in the garage, a drafty, cold, leaky place (it had been raining). There was a padded "saw horse" in there I put her on, but Beth is small of stature and the arm/leg supports really worked for someone with longer limbs and she was left in an uncomfortable way. I didn't want to do that to her again. We looked at various equipment and furniture in the room and settled on a similar saw horse, but this one worked for her frame. I pulled over a padded bench, too. My implements all lined up on a towel on the floor, I grabbed Beth. She loves to stall before a scene. Once we're into it, she's good, but getting her over the hump of starting is always hard. That's one of the reasons I spanked her at the hotel. I thought if I did it suddenly it would be a good ice breaker. But still, I could see her stalling.


I put wrist restraints on her, then ankle. This felt like a ritual, even though it was only the second time (and I believe only the second time she'd ever had them on). Like the first time, I could see this had the desired effect of making her more nervous and also subduing her to some degree.


So I did what I do: I grabbed her and yanked her over my lap and started. She was wearing a beautiful (she called it "slutty" and "street walker", but it was gorgeous) black dress, black thigh-highs and pumps. I pulled up the dress and began to spank her bottom again. After a few minutes she relaxed and let it happen. This being our "harsh" scene and all, after warming her up I started laying in pretty hard with the hand, then switched to a London Tanners nanny paddle and the paddle I won at FMS for winning the naming contest (the "black hornet" -- a stingy little bastard). 


I was relentless. I pounded on her ass! The night was young so the room was fairly empty and the loud crack! sounds of the implements on her firm bottom really resonated around the room. After a while of this I stood her up and pulled off her stockings and had her take off her dress. I led her onto the saw horse and threatened her to keep her hands and legs down, else I clasp her onto the furniture so she couldn't move. (You see, she has a real problem with putting her hands back to cover her bum and when she's really in pain to rub it out herself--and she can kick, which can be really annoying when she's wearing stilettos. Once she almost poked my eye out with the fucking things!)


I used my dragon's tail, devil's tongue and crops on her, all over her body. I'd used Old Hickory, my favorite wood cane, from shoulder to toe, really marking her ass:




It went on for some time like this until finally I was ready to move into some sensation play. I thought Beth might be tired from the saw horse, so I took her off and stood her at a flogging post next to us, attaching her wrists to it (much to her chagrin, I can tell you!). I undressed her and started on the wartenburg wheel, multi-reed cane bundle, fur mitt with bear claws, knives--the works. Knives and one of my pokey wheels with little soft brushes always makes Beth crazy and gets her to scream. At one point we had about eight or nine people around watching us.


More caning, more crops and then it back onto the bench again. But before we went to the bench, I stood Beth up, clasped her hands behind her back, and then led her through the main room. "Wait. Where are we going?" she said in a panic.  


"Outside past the fire pit to the kitchen."


"Past all those people?" Beth's eyes grew wide. "I'm naked!" 


"Yes, I know."


"Wait."  She wanted to stall.  "I didn't know you were going to restrain me!"


"You can't cover yourself up this way," I replied and then grabbed her wrists and led her out of the room and outside. All eyes were either on her body or looking away out of some sort of strange politeness or prudence (we're at a dungeon for God's sake!). We went to the kitchen, I grabbed a few Reese's Pieces, popped them in my mouth, then walked her back to the main room. I held her tightly for a moment.


"That was sooooo hard," she said, burying her face in my shoulder. 


At this point, nearly two hours had gone by and was really ramping things up. I punished her bottom with my century-old razor strop, literally giving it everything I had until Beth was begging me to stop. I moved to straps, belts and then my wood paddle. It was intense, hard, harsh and relentless. 


I noticed her need to take "breaks" more frequently, needing to pause to catch her breath more, so I knew we were reaching some sort of tolerance limit (though I'm sure she could take more than what we did).  We wrapped up with a nasty flurry of paddling, really taking her to the brink, before I stopped to wrap my arms around her and hold her until she came back.


Though the scene ended rather abruptly, I think we went a long way toward the pushing bit. Between the intensity/harshness of the play, the nudity and "the walk" I think we went well beyond her comfort zone and to some place she really needed to go.


Thank you, Beth, for an amazing scene. You're a wonderful play partner and I always, always, always appreciate your respect and trust.


Beth's bottom the morning after...