Friday, August 31, 2012

Off to Vegas

Like so many of my Fellow Kinksters, I'm off to Vegas this afternoon for a weekend of fun, frolicking spanking activities at Shadow Lane. This is my first party since last year's Shadow Lane, a bit of an oddity for me since normally I go to Boardwalk Badness Weekend at FMS' Tropical Beach Party. A lot of changes have been happening in my life in the last year (almost a year to the day to be precise) and I'll be filling you all in on some of that in future posts here soon. Suffice it to say, I'm happy to be going, happing to be seeing old friends. I've fallen off the face of the Earth in terms of my kinkster life, I fear (other than this blog, which I realize has been spotty at times) but look forward to a vigorous return.

Sunday, August 26, 2012

Where am I?


So once again the blog has fallen into a lugubrious state as I'm on the road for five trips over four weeks with an overnight at home in between each--generally around 12 hours on the ground. Of course, one of those weeks was a vacation and one trip will be to Shadow Lane in Vegas over Labor Day Weekend. The rest is business and mostly to the Middle East where, as you regular readers will know, my blog is blocked. 

So while I rack up the frequent flyer miles let me once again apologize for not providing you with interesting missives, musings and hilarity. I'll be back to my regularly scheduled programming soon...

Friday, August 17, 2012

Welcome Tops


Doesn't seem like a very legit conference.

Shot this while driving down the road in Memphis (I think--it's been a while).

Friday, August 10, 2012

You know...for the kiddies!

A hot trend for the last couple years has been dubbed "urban vinyl"--designer toys with a decidedly less-than-mainstream bent aimed at adults. Check 'em out for yourself at places like KidRobot. Neat stuff. Some are collectibles valued at hundreds of dollars apiece. (Yours Truly has his own set of dozens such figures at work.) There's a series of cigarette chompin' rabbits called "Smorkin' Labbit". The newest in the line? Their "dark bedroom attire" model.





Wednesday, August 8, 2012

Monday, August 6, 2012

Dom, Top, Disciplinarian, Master

There are a lot of terms used to describe someone who leans (or is) into dominance/submission. I myself wrote about the differences between being tops and doms back in 2009. But there are as many views about terminology as there are kinksters, with no clear delineation between one term and another. You've got all kinds of labels/descriptors: doms, tops, disciplinarians, masters, sirs, etc. Many (if not most) in the leather community believe titles such as "sir" and "master" are bestowed, earned. There are far too many asshats (Erica's term, lovingly borrowed) out there trolling alt.com and FetLife who've given themselves a title, naively or simply because they don't care.

I've never gone with a descriptor other than top, even though there are times and with certain individuals when my demeanor, attitude and approach leans toward dom, to be sure. First of all, I think some of those titles truly are earned. I'm not a master at shit. I'd love to be, but I'm not, even after being in the lifestyle publicly for a number of years. And certainly my opinion on such things has been an evolution over the years. 

As you could read from that post linked above, I was pretty adamant to being a top, period. But over time, in developing relationships with others, and in discovering myself, I've watched as my own leanings bent toward being a dominant. Some tell me such inclinations are inherent to the individual and that my own dominant traits are innate. I don't know. I certainly know that a person can bring out that trait a lot stronger in me than others. Lizzie, for example, was the one of the first people to really pull out my dominant side even before I saw it as such. Over time she and I have developed our own protocol, our own version of D/s that works for us. I don't have anything to compare it to. Other experiments with other women have had varying degrees of success for varying reasons. 

One description I came up with for my particular type of dominance I wrote as "...a life coach with consequences." I helped keep my play partner on track, within certain guidelines and goals and if she veered off course, there was hell to pay. Since then, I think my leanings with LIzzie could be seen as even more D/s than that. 

(I'd love to hear her perspective on the subject in a blog of hers someday. I've always been keen on the top/bottom perspectives to the same subject. In the past, Erica & I and Lizzie & I have blogged about our scenes from each of our viewpoints and recollections, which I personally found fascinating. A bit Rashomon at times.)

Whether I'm drawn into being a dom, a top or a disciplinarian I try to do it in a way where I'm learning as I go and being as real to the moment as I can be. As my own evolution continues I will strive to share it with each of you, Fellow Kinksters. 

Thursday, August 2, 2012

Kinkiest Olympics Ever

I'm not above reposting when I've got nothing to say. This was sent to me by a vanilla friend showing some hilariously kinky misconstrued images from the 2012 London Olympics games thus far.

I strongly urge you to check out the 23 Olympic Photos even more awkwardly erotic than the porn you just finished watching from Jockular.com: